"I am a man who walks alone
And when I'm walking a dark road
At night or strolling through the park
When the light begins to change
I sometimes feel a little strange
A little anxious when it's dark."
('Fear of the Dark-Iron Maiden)
Do I fear the dark...Dark being the unknown..the path not treaded...the world not explored...??!!!
Do I fear change...change being movement away from stagnation...movement away from status quo...???
I guess I do..!!!
It is human tendency to be wary of the unknown..All the myths and fantasies across civilizations attempt to explain the latter....
It is also a human tendency to resist change....History bears testimony to this...the stagnation of the medieval period and the subsequent resistance to a movement towards 'rebirth' or 'renaissance' documents a very good exapmple of this very human trait....
So , with all the historical burden can I be any different...
Changes bothered me since a very young age....ensconced comfortably in a particular lifestyle...i hated it when I had to shift to another city..another school..owing to my dad's transferable job....
Changes bother me a lot more now... shifting base for higher studies or a new job is something that instills in me apprehension...the fear of the unknown overpowers my sensibilities....the pragmatic side of me loses to the unyielding side which breeds on inertia and stagnation....is stagnation more powerful than change??? or is resistance a painful process???
The sense of ennui should ideally fuel the desire for adventure... on the contrary..i seem to be enjoying banality... I guess it is to do with absence of passion to do things lately....
I was very passionate about dancing...reading....writing..at different points of time...
Dunno when and how I lost interest in all the three.... Writing used to give me a lot of satisfaction...it was a stimulant, inspiring me to do things... Where did I lose track.....??!!
Instead of repenting, I should mend my ways now...
So even though stagnation was all pervasive till now... the realization that change is always for the good and thoroughly required should mark a new beginning....
Let me tread the path of renaissance by trying ot get up early tomorrow...(it seems very difficult at the outset- resistance afterall is a painful process..!!!)
